Interview with a Former Muslim

By Dr. Jay Zinn

Naeem, what were the events that led up to your conversion to Christianity?

For me it began when my older brother, Mahmoud, left our home in Kuwait to attend a college in South Carolina. He came back for a visit and told us he was a Christian. That’s when I pinned him to the wall and threatened to kill him. It was pretty intense. When my brother left to return to the United States, the Iraq and Kuwait war took place. After it ended, I came to America to stay with Mahmoud. I was 18 or 19 at the time. He backed off from talking about Jesus, maybe because of my threats, and our relationship was not that good. But his friends were interesting. I was a foreigner, alone—so I began to attend a college campus ministry called Fellowship of Christian Athletes to find friends and figure out what this American culture was all about. That’s when I started having serious conversations about Jesus, though I was still against it.

For a Muslim, God being personal and intimate would make him less than God since God was almighty. If there was a God who could relate to us, and somehow become a man, it just demeaned God for me. He was no longer sovereign, almighty, or omnipresent. He was not the “one” God, because now you are throwing in Jesus, the Son of God, and you’ve got the Holy Spirit, too. Muslims have a hard time understanding and accepting the concept of the Trinity. So I argued with my brother and even challenged his claim that God wanted to have a relationship with me. I remember looking at a bush as we walked by and said, “If God is so real, why doesn’t he just come down here? Isn’t there a burning bush story?” And my brother replied, “If you ask him to reveal himself, he’ll do it.” I mocked him and didn’t think any more about it.

But a couple of weeks later, I went back to the Fellowship of Christian Athletes meeting, and prayed privately. I said, “You know what—if you’re real, God, you’ll show yourself.” Three nights after that prayer, on Halloween, I was in my room, trying to fall asleep. I suddenly noticed a strange presence, like death, fear and terror had walked in to the room. I was in the middle of stretching and got stuck in the stretch. Something grabbed my shoulders, pinned me to my pillow and paralyzed the rest of my body. I started screaming, cursing, but couldn’t hear myself saying anything. All I could do was move my head.

Finally, the door opened and in walked this demon with a gargoyle-like figure. He appeared physical but yet he wasn’t. He said he was going to kill me, and I believed him. I thought maybe this is Allah coming to punish me. And then I thought maybe this is Jesus. I thought of Jesus for a split second and this demon walked up to my bed and then disappeared. Whatever was holding me down, let go, too, but I could still feel a presence. So I slowly got up, ran out of the room, and woke my brother. “I think I’m cursed!” I said, “What is going on?” Mahmoud tried to calm me and told me about demons and angels. He told me about Jesus. He told me what he thought my life was. He told me that I was on top of a hill and whichever way I fell, it would either be deep into God, and what he had for me, or the other way into what I was living now.

I was scared. I told my brother I didn’t even know if Jesus was Lord, I just knew there was something supernatural in my room that was trying to kill me. And so I prayed. I prayed out loud, “Jesus I don’t know you. So I don’t know if you are the savior of the world. I can’t say that I love you because I don’t know you. But if you would save me, I will give you my whole life.” After I said that, my brother prayed for me. Then I said, “Okay, now what?” He said, “Go back to your room.” I said, “No, I’m sleeping with you.” He said, “No,” and gave me a small Gideon’s Bible and told me to read John and he’ll see me in the morning.

So I went back to my room, turned on all the lights, sat on my bed, and read John a little bit. For an hour, I was confused and mad. Fear turned in to anger. I began to say things like, “This isn’t fair. This isn’t right what I’ve been through. I’ve just lost everything. Why can’t my life be normal?” Finally, I just looked up and said, “Jesus, if I die tonight, it’s your fault.” I got up and turned off all the lights, put the covers over my head, got into a fetal position and kept saying to myself, “Whatever happens, don’t open your eyes. Don’t let yourself get pinned down like that again.”

Then I felt something shake me. Oh here we go again. I sat up in bed with my eyes open, and stared into a new presence. He said, “I am Jesus, your life is not your own.” I didn’t know what that meant, but I knew it. I kept staring into that presence. The peace of God was so aggressive; an experience, where you don’t just see someone, but you feel they are inside of you. Physically, I couldn’t keep my eyes off him, but I couldn’t keep them open, either. I literally fell asleep until morning. When I got up, I felt I was supposed to be in some type of ministry. That started the journey.

How did your family react to your conversion?

The next summer, my sister came to the U.S. and said, “Hey, are you like Mahmoud?” because she knew he was a Christian. When I told her my story, she quit talking to me for a solid week. She wouldn’t look at me. I remember walking the beach and thinking, I can’t believe this. I was reading scriptures like…if your mother and father forsake you, you have to love me more than your sister or brother. I remember saying, “This isn’t right! Jesus, I just don’t like you. You cannot make me do this.” Two months later, we were in a restaurant, just sitting down when I felt God say, “Take her out for a walk, she’s going to get saved.” So I did. She started to cry, we prayed, and she fell to the ground. When she got up, she said, “I’m free.” She was saved, and we walked back in and finished dinner.

The next summer, my mom and dad, and my younger sister and brother, all came to America. We tried to figure out if we could all live here. I was in college, my sister was in college, and our plan was to tell mom, but not dad about our conversion. Dad went back after a month, so I took my mom for a walk one day and had the conversation with her. It broke her heart. In her words, this stabbed her in the heart. She could not believe this. It was hard for us. I was crying… she was crying. She stopped eating for several days. She quit talking to everybody and started praying. Finally, she asked who else had become a Christian. So I told her. She called dad and said, “What do you want to do? Do you want to move them back?” Their first reaction was to take us all home.

Several days later, she broke her silence. She was angry, screaming, and saying all kinds of things. Everybody cried. It was a nightmare. I went into one of the rooms and told Mahmoud, “You deal with this. I cannot.” So I went in to the next room, and took my younger sister, Atia, because it was getting crazy out there. I sat on the bed, and she was on the floor. “Why are you doing this?” she said. “Why, why, why?” I just said, “It’s Jesus. I didn’t do this.” Suddenly I felt a shift in the room. I felt God’s presence and asked in my head…did you just walk in, Lord? He said, “Yes, I’m here, and she’s going to pray with you now.” I said, “Okay.” And then he said, “I want to touch her.”

So I turned and said, “Atia, I know this seems crazy, but do you feel Jesus? She looked up and said, “Yes.” I said, “Do you want to pray?” She said, “Yes.” So right there I prayed with her to receive Christ while mom was still screaming outside. Right there…my sister, Atia, gets saved. I told her to keep it between us for now. At this point, I didn’t know what was going on. Several months later, my younger brother also became a Christian.

Fast-forward and we’ve gone through a lot. When my parents found out this happened to their kids, my mom realized it was not a theology thing—it was a God thing. Something real was happening here. She respected it. Even now, respects it. So it’s been over ten years and what’s beautiful is that mom and dad live with me in my house. They’re still Muslim. She prays. But when she really wants something to happen she talks to me. She’s at the church I pastor every weekend, serving in the nursery, as a Muslim woman, with her whole dress thing on. So it’s kind of an interesting conversation I think God is having with her through our life with them.

Naeem, what are the some differences between Islam and Christianity?

The biggest difference is the contrast of fear and love.

In Islam, love is not really the motivation. The fear of Allah, or the fear of God is the characteristic of their God. God is a punisher, God is a judge, and he will bring justice. So when Muslims talk to each other, or encourage each other, it’s always by the fear of Allah. Don’t do this or that, because God sees you and God will get you back.

In Christianity, love was the motivation of the Father to send Jesus. Every decision that God makes is always compelled by love. Sometimes we forget that. That God so loved the world—not that God so hated sin. God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, and that his love is beyond just love for humans. He loves everything he creates. So, he sent his Son to redeem everything, and not just humanity. Also, Islam is founded on the “will of Allah.” There is the fear of Allah and there is the will of Allah. Allah is in total control when you try to pursue a relationship with him, or try to get into heaven. It all comes down to Allah’s will. So you have to make sure you convince him you’re worthy of heaven. Like in a court room, you better prove your case. When you sin, you better make remission for that. I grew up sacrificing animals because Muslims have to atone for their sins. This was once a year, sometimes twice. Muslims know at the end of their life they have to balance out their sins. But they never really know where they stand with Allah; they just know they have a better chance if they’re better people and hope for the best on judgment day.

In Christianity, a relationship with God is motivated and initiated by him. Because of God’s grace for us, through Christ’s atoning sacrifice, there is a total acceptance. So Christians do things because we’ve been granted favor in God. In Islam, you do things to get favor from Allah.

How can we as Christians interact with Muslims when they’re placed in the paths of our life?

I think Muslims are looking for a genuine faith. In the Western church, you see movements going on where churches are seeker-sensitive; they make Christianity pliable and less radical than it is. I don’t think Muslims are attracted to that because, to them, it’s just a nice way to live and they’re already doing that. Muslims have to see a supernatural, unnatural presence of God in people’s lives. That’s the only thing that will attract them. It goes beyond where their religion can ever go.

Muslims aren’t really looking for another way to live. In fact, Islam is pretty decent, if you take out all the extremes. It’s nice. They’re good people. Hospitality to them is a virtue. Muslims are known for it. It doesn’t even matter what country they are living in. They have that. But they’ll look at something their Islam can’t offer—which is a supernatural presence and working in peoples’ lives that they can feel. All of the conversions that I have experienced and led Muslim people into have been supernatural. They’ve never been like, “Oh yeah, you’re right!” No, they’re moved by the supernatural dynamic of God. Healings, dreams—lots of dreams and visions. And on a practical note, I would say invite them to everything. Every religious activity you can. They would be open to that and not be offended. But be ready to go to theirs. They’re not going to go to yours if you don’t go to theirs.

If we are now experiencing a relationship with a Muslim that has gone beyond an acquaintance, where they have come into our lives, and there’s a comfortableness there—would you then just pray that Jesus reveals himself to them in a supernatural way?

I don’t challenge Muslims to believe in Jesus. I invite them to come to a point where they say, “I’m really going to search. I’m really going to seek.” I know some Christians are unnerved by that. I only ask Muslims to really pursue Jesus, to learn about him. Understand what he’s saying in the gospels they attest to him, or maybe seek him by praying out loud to him. If Jesus does not reveal himself to them, then walk away. But if he does, then go after him and start the journey. Because I believe those who seek him will find him.